you know what i love?

hot guys at the library. Yum.
I figure if I can handle swim season and not starting homework until about 8 everyday, then school should be a breeze for me and I shouldn't worry about not having enough time.
Anyway, hot guys at the library. Not only are they smart, but they're hot. I caught myself blatantly staring at this one incredibly attractive guy yesterday and he looked at me briefly and awkwardly and we made eye contact so I looked away. Then when he was walking away with his back turned, I looked at him again and I'm pretty sure he could sense me looking at him again. He probably thinks I'm creepy, but then again he probably gets people staring at him a lot. Oh, the spell that beauty casts over us. I read somewhere about an experiment (i think it was on NBC, you can look it up) with two really attractive models (male and female) and two dull-er looking average people (male and female) and they compared how society treated them when doing everyday things (like asking to cut in line, asking for directions, etc.) But people were like 10 times nicer and more polite to the attractive people, even if they weren't the opposite gender. So how we look determines a lot about how we are treated by the people around us and i guess I'm pretty lucky because I could have turned out worse, haha. It would just be cool to try out someone else's shoes, you know? see how other people view the world from day to day. It must be very different.

I love caffine
thats all.
and if you havent watched this, do it now. Please, please do it
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CD2LRROpph0&feature=related

k. hey so im back. im gonna start posting in here more cuz i have time.
What am i supposed to do with my life. thats the question. I feel so contemplative after my nap. you guys know what I mean.
I desperately want to not care what other people think so that people will think im cool. If that made any sense. Its just completely contradictory. If your looking for confidence so that people will respect you then you're really not confident because your confidence is just a tool to find acceptance and respect from others.
I'm so contemplative after my nap. Everything is a dream. Everythings is different.
I have a long list of things i have to do today and i havent touched on any of them. How great is that. I heard this from somewhere: too many things to do plus me not knowing where to start equals me not doing anything. My life.

heyyeyeye

so i got a tumblr, i just started, like an hour ago and i barely have any posts but hopefully il start getting into it
http://ya0ming.tumblr.com/
yaoming cuz im tall and half chinese

okay a real post

So we're reading The Things They Carried in English class and its a great great book. Its great because the language runs smoothly and its descriptive in all the right ways; everything it talks about is interesting. I can read it about a minute a page, which for me is good because I'm usually an impossibly slow reader.
All I really want to talk about now is swim season because it's so much fun. The guys are great and are all accepting of my sexuality. Even though it's not often explicitly mentioned around me I know they are okay with it. Maybe there's the initial shock of finding out, then it goes away.
Everything moves faster now, and there's always practice or meets to look forward to. Now that its break there's so much that I can/should do with my free time that I haven't gotten to. I feel like break hasn't hit me yet.

dear blog friends

never write or talk for the sake of writing/talking. you give people a false sense of meaning in your words and people won't listen to you anymore

L-O-V-E's just another word I never learned to pronounce

3OH!3 !!!!!!!!!!! I used to think they sucked but the truth was i never actually listened to their music lol. I've always tried to be all altenative-y and listen to songs that I thought other people didn't listen to. I listened to mainstream songs sometimes before but now Im starting to listen to them a lot and I'm getting into rap too. I love lil wayne Never thought I'd say that.
It's about 3 weeks into the swim season and we've had 4 meets. I won the 50 free yesterday and it was a huge rush cuz everyone was cheering and I touched a guy out who was supposed to beat me by half a second.
I also got my first local newspaper interview yesterday.. after I won the 50. The guy called me by the wrong name and thought i won the 200 IM. it was awkward.
But swim season is really fun and it's a lot different now that I'm an upperclassman and I practice with guys that are younger than me. Theres this whole new sense of responsibility and pressure to know what you're doing. I'm getting more respect and recognition its nice. It's still just as fun as years before, if not more.