So this whole new 'bro' thing is developing where everyone calls each other 'bro' or variations on bro like 'broseph' or 'brochacho' or 'bromosexual' (lol). Basically a manly term of endearment. My friend peter made a group on facebook where basically everyone contributes to a long list of 'bro' words (it got pretty popular, it has like 200 members). I used to never call anyone bro but now I've been starting to. It's a good substitute if you don't know someone's name and you come off as friendly.
It's pretty cloudy outside and it was raining hard during school today. I don't really mind what the weather is long as it's not really cold outside.
So I'm finding out about more people that know that I'm gay. The guy I told not too long ago told a guy who's on the swim team and was on my relay team at state last year. Then apparently some of the college guys found out and were just like 'I'm glad I graduated before that happened'. Whatever. No one really treats me differently though. Guys are probably more uncomfortable around me but for the most part they act the same. Sometimes they're nicer. Some (few) intentionally flirt with me. I don't get it. I wish I knew the mentality of a straight guy.
I'm gonna go time the girl's swim meet soon. We're going out to eat first and my friends picking me up soon. I'm so glad I'm part of the swim team. It's nice being part of something bigger.
My days have been really mixed. I'll have a shitty day one day and feel like crap then feel great the next day. I just wana learn to feel good all the time ...I can really use a boyfriend
Look up Sia- Soon We'll be Found on youtube. I love that song and video. Then there's this cool animated video that my friend showed me about a kid and a spider.. it's really good. It's called 'Story From North America' it's on youtube. It's a song I want to fall asleep to.
White Winter Hymnals by Fleet Foxes is good. So is: Wagon Wheel by Old Crow Medicine Show, Reckoner by Radiohead (<-- everyone must hear this song. If you haven't look it up), Sleepyhead by Passion Pit, My Love by Sia.. and thats it.
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Sexuality is far more plastic than most people realize; that's not to say individuals don't have limits - they do - but the limits aren't always in the same place from day to day.
ReplyDeleteAlso, something I learned over the years: guys often don't get the kind of affirmation/validation/feelings of "attractiveness" they want from girls. Generally, it's the girl who is the pursued and the guy who is pursuing, so straight guys don't often get the kind of rush that comes when someone hits on you. Many that do get hit on generally worry (or resent) that it's only for their looks.
So, in addition to those guys who might be willing to experiment, you'll also have guys who will flirt and such just because they like the feeling of being attractive. There are also some who'll just feel "safe" around you: you aren't seen as "competition" and they might feel like they can be a little more relaxed or vulnerable.
And, of course, a slew of other reasons and scenarios. But having "straight" guys "flirt" isn't all that rare; you just have to try and figure out where the line should be drawn with regards to your responses :)
I just found your blog and read back through some of your postings. "Were the World Mine" is a good movie but there were a few places where little changes would have made it much better. The title song is really good - listening to it cheers me up on a down day. I thought the other actor was cuter than Tanner Cohen though - the blondish guy - he had much better pecs.
ReplyDeleteAustin: Thanks so much for your response. You made some good points that I hadn't thought about. It'll be interesting to see other guys' responses to my sexuality.
ReplyDeleteGreen and Purple: Haha yeah, his real names Nathaniel David Becker and I agree he is hoott. And has a nice body. Tanner's a dbag and that ruined him for me. Nathaniel seems like a nice guy though. He's straight unfortunately.
When it comes to people's take on bromosexuality, there are the people who don't mind, then there the people who call everything "faggot". The problem is that, like most things, the line between the two is blurry. Sometimes, you just have to take life by the horns and deal with the consequences later. Also, I can NEVER tell when a guy is coming on to me or not! Why can't they just say whether or not they're kidding? If I don't take it seriously, I might miss something, but if I do, it can end my reputation and I'll have to move. Somebody please invent the gaydar. And soon.
ReplyDeleteHahahaha yea. If someone invented gaydar... make my life so much easier. And it is hard to tell how guys feel about it. For the most part I keep my distance unless the guy shows that he's okay with some flirting. I'm just too afraid to initiate the flirting -sigh-
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